Why It's So Hard To End A Toxic Relationship

Ending a toxic relationship can be one of the most difficult and emotionally taxing experiences a person can go through. Whether it's a toxic marriage, a toxic dating relationship, or even a toxic friendship, the signs of a toxic relationship can be hard to spot, and even harder to leave.

At Jenny Seale Coaching, we understand the unique challenges that come with leaving a toxic relationship. As a certified trauma recovery coach and a narcissistic abuse survivor myself, I have the training and experience to help you navigate the complex and often confusing process of healing from abuse. Read on to learn more and reach out for help.

Gaslighting & Manipulation

One of the most insidious toxic traits in a relationship is gaslighting, where your partner manipulates and distorts your reality, making you question your own sanity. This can make it incredibly difficult to trust yourself and your own perceptions, making it hard to leave the relationship.

Fear of Being Alone

Many people in toxic relationships may fear being alone, which can cause them to cling to the relationship, even if it is causing them harm or is not beneficial to their well-being. Toxic relationships can have a deep and lasting impact on an individual, leading to feelings of insecurity, low self-esteem, and even depression. It is important for individuals to recognize the signs of a toxic relationship in order to make the best decision for their physical, mental, and emotional health.

Fear of the Unknown

Leaving a toxic relationship can be scary because it means facing the unknown. What will life be like without your partner? How will you cope with the emotional fallout of the relationship? These fears can make it hard to take the first step toward leaving.

Emotional & Psychological Trauma

Narcissistic and psychological abuse can have a devastating impact on a person's mental and emotional well-being. The trauma from the relationship can cause feelings of worthlessness, guilt, and fear. It can lead to anxiety and depression, as well as physical health issues like insomnia, fatigue, and even heart problems. It can also make it hard to trust or connect with other people, and make it difficult to leave the relationship, as the person may feel like they are not strong enough to handle the emotional fallout.

If you're ready to start your healing journey, we're here to help. Contact us today to schedule an initial consultation. Together, we can work towards finding sure-footing in the present and walking confidently into the life you want.

Recognizing the Patterns of a Toxic Relationship

At Jenny Seale Coaching, we understand the toll that narcissistic and psychological abuse can take on a person's well-being. That's why we specialize in helping survivors heal from their trauma and reclaim their lives. As a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach and survivor of narcissistic abuse myself, I know firsthand the importance of having a safe, supportive, and healthy relationship during the recovery process. Continue reading and contact us today to learn more.

Lack of Respect For Boundaries

A healthy relationship involves mutual respect for each other's boundaries. In a toxic relationship, one person may constantly invade the other's personal space, make decisions for them, or not respect their requests for alone time.

Constant Criticism & Belittling

In a toxic relationship, one person may constantly criticize and belittle their partner, often using manipulative tactics to make them feel inferior or worthless. This can have a devastating impact on the victim's self-esteem and can make them feel like they are constantly walking on eggshells.

Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which the abuser causes the victim to doubt their own perceptions and memories. They may deny events or behaviors that took place or manipulate evidence to make the victim doubt their own recollection of events. This can leave the victim feeling confused, isolated, and unsure of what is real.

Unpredictability & Inconsistency

In a toxic relationship, the abuser may be prone to sudden, extreme mood swings or may frequently change their behavior or expectations. This can create a sense of uncertainty and instability for the victim, making it difficult for them to feel safe or secure in the relationship.

If you are experiencing any of these signs of a toxic relationship, it is important to seek help and support from a trusted friend, family member, or professional. Remember, you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and you deserve to be in a healthy, supportive relationship. If you are considering leaving a toxic relationship, it is important to have a plan in place to ensure your safety and well-being. At Jenny Seale Coaching, we can provide you with the specialized support and guidance you need to heal from your trauma and move forward with confidence.

Four Steps to Handle Triggers Mindfully

If you're reading this, chances are you're living with the aftermath of narcissistic abuse. This type of emotional and psychological torment can leave you feeling exhausted and alone. You may feel like you can't do anything right, and that voice in the back of your mind is always criticizing you.

Jenny Seale Coaching LLC specializes in helping survivors of narcissistic abuse heal and reclaim their lives. In this blog post, we'll discuss four steps to help you handle triggers mindfully and start moving on from the trauma inflicted by narcissistic abuse. Have questions? Please do not hesitate to contact me.

Identify Your Triggers

The first step in managing your triggers is to identify them. Ask yourself questions like what makes you feel anxious or overwhelmed, or what thoughts, feelings, and situations bring back memories of your abusive relationship? Write down your answers so you can recognize and acknowledge your triggers.

Notice Your Body's Reactions

Once you’ve identified your triggers, the next step is to pay attention to your body’s reactions. This can be difficult due to the intense emotions that often accompany these triggers. See if you can notice what physical changes occur when faced with a trigger. Do your shoulders tense up? Does your heart rate increase? Does breathing become shallow and more rapid?

Constructive Reactions

The next step is to practice constructive reactions when confronted with a trigger. This could involve grounding techniques, such as deep breathing or stretching, or engaging in positive self-talk. Remind yourself that the abuse is not your fault and that you are safe now.

Reach Out for Support

Finally, remember to reach out for support from friends, family, or a therapist. Gently remind yourself that although the abuser is no longer in your life, there is still help available to you. Jenny Seale Coaching LLC specializes in trauma recovery and can provide support and guidance as you begin your journey of healing.

The road to recovery is not easy, but Jenny Seale’s trauma coaching services can help you take back control of your life and start healing from the pain inflicted by narcissistic abuse. Contact me today to begin your journey of healing and self-discovery.

The Impact Of Childhood Neglect

Neglect is defined as the persistent failure to meet a child's basic physical and/or psychological needs, which can seriously interfere with their health and development. At Jenny Seale Coaching, we help survivors of complex developmental trauma such as neglect find a path to healing from abuse. Read more about the impact childhood neglect can have on your adult life, then contact us to begin your journey to healing.

Disrupted Attachment

One of the most significant impacts of childhood neglect is a disruption to the attachment process. This can lead to difficulties in forming and maintaining close relationships later in life. When a child does not receive the love and attention they need from their caretakers, they may come to believe that they are unworthy of love.

Emotional Struggles

Children who have experienced neglect are also more likely to experience emotional difficulties later in life. They may have trouble regulating their emotions, which can lead to problems with anxiety, depression, and anger. They may also struggle with trust issues and have difficulty forming healthy attachments.

Behavioral Struggles

Children who were neglected are also more likely to have behavioral problems in adulthood. They may act out in aggressive or destructive ways, or they may withdraw and isolate themselves from others. They may also engage in risky behaviors, such as substance abuse, as a way to cope with the pain of their childhood experiences.

Poor Risk Management

When children are neglected, they may also learn poor risk management skills. They may be more likely to take risks without considering the consequences, or they may engage in risky behaviors as a way to cope with their feelings of pain and isolation. This can lead to problems in every area of life, from personal relationships to financial stability.

As a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Jenny Seale has the knowledge and techniques you need to begin your path to healing from abuse. If you are ready to take the first step, contact Jenny Seale Coaching today.

4 of the Most Common Gaslighting Phrases to Look Out For

“Gaslighting” is a term that has seen widespread use in recent years, but the term actually originates from a 1938 play (and subsequent movie adaptations) called “Gas Light,” wherein a woman experiences a form of narcissistic emotional abuse from her husband who continuously manipulates and questions her reality and sanity. This type of insidious deception and psychological manipulation in toxic relationships continues to this day. Here at Jenny Seale Coaching, we’ve collected some of the most common gaslighting phrases to look out for.

“You’re Always Overreacting.”

Everyone is susceptible to overreacting at times — it can be a natural response, especially if you’re taken by surprise by a situation. However, if you’re being told repeatedly that you’re “always overreacting,” it’s possible that someone is trying to make you doubt or invalidate your beliefs, boundaries, or thought processes, and that seed of self-doubt can be very damaging.

“You Are Way Too Sensitive.”

Feeling and experiencing emotions doesn’t make you too sensitive — it makes you human. When we’re told repeatedly that we’re always “being too sensitive,” we can bottle up our emotions, and even truly begin to believe that there’s something wrong with the way we feel things. You do not need to feel ashamed or apologize for having feelings and expressing them.

“You Must Be Imagining Things.”

This is the central gaslighting phrase showcased in the play and film adaptations of “Gas Light.” This phrase is meant to make you doubt something you’ve seen with your own eyes or experienced firsthand, and rather than the gaslighter explaining themselves or telling the truth, they tell you that you either misunderstood or imagined something that isn’t there. You can respond to this phrase by standing your ground and saying “I’m not imagining things — I know what I saw or heard, and I expect you to tell me the truth.”

“It’s Not That Big of a Deal.”

This gaslighting phrase is often used to belittle or diminish the gravity of your own life experiences and is another method used to make you feel like your feelings aren’t valid or that you’re blowing things out of proportion. It’s possible that the person using this phrase isn’t being malicious — they simply don’t understand that what was stressful for you might not have been stressful for them, but that shouldn’t invalidate your feelings. You have a right to feel the way that you feel.

Gaslighting can be difficult to spot, and much of the time, the person gaslighting may not even be aware of what they are doing or how much it hurts. Remember, nobody deserves to be gaslit — if you feel like you’re experiencing gaslighting in a toxic relationship, contact Jenny Seale Coaching and schedule an initial consultation today.

Texts From A Narcissist To Look Out For

Narcissists are all around us. They can be our friends, family members, or even romantic partners. It's important to be able to identify the signs of narcissism so that you can protect yourself from their toxic behavior. In this blog post, we will discuss the texts that a narcissist might send you, and what they mean. If you see any of these signs in a text message, it's time to get out of the relationship! When you need help getting clarity after narcissistic and emotional abuse, you can count on Jenny Seale Coaching LLC to provide you with the support you need. Contact us today to learn more!

Overload Text Messages

If you find yourself on the receiving end of a narcissist's text messaging, you may notice that they tend to overload you with messages. They might send you multiple texts in a row, or bombard you with questions. This is their way of trying to control the conversation and keep you engaged with them. It's important to set boundaries with a narcissist, and let them know that you're not going to tolerate this behavior.

The Silent Treatment

Another thing that a narcissist might do is give you the silent treatment. They might suddenly stop responding to your texts, or they may take days to reply. This is their way of trying to control you and make you feel like you're not worthy of their time. If you notice this happening, it's important to speak up and let them know that you won't tolerate being ignored.

Ambiguous Messages

Narcissists tend to communicate in an ambiguous way. They might say things that could be interpreted in multiple ways, or they may send you mixed signals. This is their way of trying to keep you guessing and controlling the situation. If you find yourself in this situation, it's important to be direct with the narcissist. Let them know that you need them to be more clear and that you're not going to tolerate this type of communication.

The Conversation Is All About Them

If you're having a conversation with a narcissist, you may notice that they only ever talk about themselves. They might go on and on about their accomplishments, or they may try to one-up you. This is their way of trying to make themselves the center of attention and to make you feel inferior. If you find yourself in this situation, it's important to steer the conversation back to you. Let them know that you're not going to tolerate being talked over and that you have your own things to say.

These are just a few of the texts that a narcissist might send you. If you see any of these signs in a text message, it's time to get out of the relationship! When you need help getting clarity after narcissistic and emotional abuse, you can count on Jenny Seale Coaching LLC to help. Contact us today to learn more!

Deciding Whether To Stay Or Leave A Toxic Relationship

Your worth and value as a woman is incredibly important, and your personal security and emotional well-being should never be compromised. If you’re in a long-term relationship and start to notice a negative change in your boyfriend or husband, or the way he treats you, it’s important to take it very seriously. Keeping yourself safe at all times is the number one priority and maintaining that priority can often mean making some very emotionally and mentally difficult situations. Jenny Seale is a trauma recovery coach who can help you on your survivor’s journey, no matter where you are on your path. Learn more about recognizing early signs of a toxic relationship and emotional abuse and get in touch with Jenny if you need help.

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Warning Signs and Red Flags to Look Out For

Survivors of emotional abuse may notice a few red flags over the course of their relationship with their boyfriends or husbands. These signs of a toxic relationship, if recognized repeatedly, can compromise your safety as a woman and should not be ignored — even if they’re subtle. It’s possible for your abuser to show — whether it be emotionally, socially, or physically — signs of narcissistic abuse, including:

• Making you feel as though your needs or interests don’t matter

• Making you feel as though you’re not supported

• Utilizing negative language during daily communication

• Illustrating strong feelings of jealousy

• Strongly asking to know where you are at all times and to control several aspects of your life

• Heavily criticizing or controlling how you spend your money

• Making you feel as if you are walking on eggshells

• Actively separating you from your friends, family, or coworkers

If you’re unsure if any of these signs of a toxic relationship apply to you and your relationship, get the counsel you need with Jenny Seale.

How To Ask For Help and Develop a Support System

If any of the narcissistic abuse or emotional abuse signs listed above describe your relationship with your significant other, know you have the ability to take action. While it may be difficult or embarrassing to do, asking for help and developing a support system is key to the trauma recovery process. Starting a conversation with a trusted friend or family member who has your best interests at heart and can help you take action is important to formulating a plan to leave. Trauma recovery coach Jenny Seale can also provide an outlet for communicating, developing a support system, and moving towards a better future.

How To Go No-Contact

If you’ve started recognizing any signs of a toxic relationship, narcissistic abuse, or emotional abuse; and have started reaching out to trusted friends or loved ones for help; the next step is to go no-contact with your abuser. The method of going “no contact” is designed to prevent any more contact with your narcissistic partner, whether it be in-person or online. This method involves:

• Not answering the person's phone calls or text messages

• Blocking the person’s number from your phone

• Blocking the person on social media

• Avoiding going to places where the person frequents (to avoid meeting in-person)

• Not meeting with the person face-to-face

How To Leave Safely

Leaving a toxic relationship is a move that requires a large amount of courage, and the support system you’ve established can help make the process easier. Opening up to trusted friends or loved ones and getting help from a trauma recovery coach like Jenny Seale is a great place to start if you notice signs of a toxic relationship. Keep members of your support system close to you as you gather up belongings or other items from the abuser’s household and, if necessary, seek protection from law enforcement.

Recognizing signs of a toxic relationship, narcissistic abuse, or emotional abuse is considerably difficult, especially if you don’t have the right support. Jenny Seale specializes in helping survivors of abuse work through their trauma without any triggering, shaming, or retraumatization. It’s her mission as a certified International Association of Trauma Recovery Coaches (IAOTRC) member to help patients work towards a better future. Reach out today if you need help!

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

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